A short story work in progress

2008-08-11 09:45:49 pm

red chamber dream

Quote from Bolognab:

Whenever Nicole is mentioned, I think of that girl in your avatar. >_>

Cool, that was definitely my intention: I took this avatar specifically for this story and will go back to my regular one once I'm finished Chapter One. But alas, it's not Nicole. I chose Amanda Seyfried as she is also a target of my affection.

arkarian

2008-08-11 09:47:33 pm

red chamber dream

Quote from uNsane:

Quote from Arkarian:

"Pet freshman", what could that mean— some sort of 'thing' upper classmen had with certain ninth graders, like a sort of mentorship?

I, personally, feel that the best thing there would be question marks, rather than a comma or colon and a dash.

"Pet freshman"? What could that mean?

I definitely like the dash after "mean", but you know, after looking at it again, I think you're right about the question mark after "freshman'". Consider it changed.
Thanks everyone for the continued feedback; this is exactly what I was hoping for. ^.^

arkarian

Edit history:

arkarian: 2008-08-15 08:56:29 pm

2008-08-13 10:30:19 am

red chamber dream

Part IV — Eternal Rest

Mornings at FSK were quite the spectacle: the school was shaped so that the main hallways formed a large square. Kids would walk around and around in either direction from the time they arrived till the first bell, just like herds of cattle. It was ironic because other schools had nicknamed us "Cornfield High" due to our very rural location (and the actual cornfields surrounding the school). We were all seen as farmers or hicks, which was supposed to be a bad thing, and here we were, grazing mindlessly through our cornfield, playing right into the stereotype.

I didn't mind, though—at least we weren't Heroin High like Westminster—and I was never much for school spirit anyway. Besides, walking the halls in the morning was pretty good exercise if your bus got there early enough, and you passed practically everyone at least once. This was especially good if there was one particular person you wanted to see.

So the next few days at school were cruel: I could think of nothing but Thursday's game— and of Nicole, of course. I would watch her as she passed me in the halls, beautiful as ever, and sometimes she would even give me the slightest of smiles. Good. At least she wasn't ignoring me in person anymore.

None of my friends knew about my new companion. What would they think of my obsession with this junior girl, almost three years older than me, especially when we were never seen together? Thursday morning I forwent the grazing and instead hung by the lockers we never used with my friends that were usually there. Our morning lineup fluctuated, but most of the time I could at least find Erin and David: both were very cool, and both, though David especially, had been my friends for a very long time.

I tried to chat with them like normal, and I did well, considering my mind was elsewhere: down the hall, in fact, as I glimpsed Nicole in the distance, walking in my direction. Of course I got nothing from her but that tiny smile, but it was bigger than before and singlehandedly made today better than the last.

The final bell came faster than I expected; it was the hour-long wait for the buses to arrive that was worst. As I hung around the back parking lot with Jake, I knew this was going to become a routine— quick day at school, torturous wait afterward, not to mention that volleyball games were only on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Sometimes some of the volleyball girls would hang out with us, but it was mostly the JV players; rarely would I see anyone on Varsity, besides maybe Jake's sister Naomi. And never Nicole.

"Hey you." My patient waiting had paid off. Nicole appeared beside me as I was getting on the bus.

"Oh hey!" Still needed to play it cool, had to sound glad she was there, but not too thrilled.

"Where do you wanna sit?"

"Doesn't matter to me." As long as it's next to you.

I followed her to a seat toward the back of the bus. Today she wore light blue jeans—my favorite type on girls—and the same white sweatshirt as usual, but she was no longer White Sweatshirt Girl. Now she was Nicole, my secret friend, and the bus was where we could talk— about everything or nothing at all, and we did both, sharing small parts of ourselves at a time until we knew each other better than anyone had before.

The Eagles won their match, and the one after that and the one after that. Nothing ever changed in volleyball, but each bus ride with Nicole brought us closer together. She was exactly like me, it seemed, and even though we were basically the same person, she was still mysterious to me, the way she sat so casually, the way she pronounced every word as if laughing, and all the little mannerisms I had adored since I'd first happened into her seat last a week ago.

I started seeing more of Nicole after school and at games. I'd make my way toward the team huddles between sets and offer her words of encouragement as the girls went for water. Sometimes she'd ask me to practice with her between the JV and Varsity games, and we'd hit the ball back and forth as we verbally did the same.

I wasn't quite sure what Jake thought of us, but that didn't concern me. Nicole was my secret friend—though I wasn't quite sure why I wanted to keep her secret—and I took every chance I got to be near her, even if that meant leaving Jake to listen to his CD player or talk with his sister.

We got back to the school fairly early one night. I had borrowed Naomi's phone to call my parents just before pulling into the parking lot, so they wouldn't be here for another fifteen minutes. I sighed as I got off the bus and went to wait at the school entrance, where there were benches.

After a while, Nicole sat down beside me. Just as I was hoping.

"Where's your ride?"
"They should be here in like ten minutes. Why haven't you left yet?" She usually drove straight home after getting off the bus.

"'Cause I didn't want to leave you here alone." Her voice was almost motherly, but that might have been part of the reason I was so infatuated with her.

I looked around the parking lot. It was true; everyone had left but us.

"Aww, thanks." It was intentionally saccharine, but I was more than glad she was here.

She laughed. "Do you want to go sit in my car?"

"Sure."

We walked to her car, a white sedan of some sort—I didn't care enough about cars to tell what model it was—and she got in, unlocking the passenger door for me.

"You've gotta hear this band," she said as I sat down. I felt completely comfortable here.

"Who is it?"

"Avenged Sevenfold."

"Never heard of 'em."

"I'm like obsessed with them now. Here, this is the song I like." She turned to track 6, and screeching guitars filled the car. It was a pretty heavy song.

"I didn't know you liked this type of music," I half–shouted. Music was one of the few things we had yet to talk about.

"I dunno, I just really like this band. I saw them play in the summer. Do you like it?" Nicole was 'rocking out' to the intricate guitar solos that began the song, singing along to lyrics I couldn't understand. It was as if the music had overtaken a part of her, and she was more attractive to me now than ever before.

"Yeah, they sound good." And they were. I liked this type of music; I liked every type of music, especially what she liked.

She turned it down some, and we sat there, listening to this new band. I couldn't stop looking over at her, taking in her dark blonde hair and sparkling eyes, and she smiled every time I did, making her eyes even brighter. Nothing needed to be said, just being there with her in the middle of the dark parking lot was enough.

Organs started playing near the end of the song, and I realized I had forgotten about my parents— I didn't want them finding me in a car with some upper classman they didn't know.

"Well, my parents'll probably be here soon, so I should probably go," I sighed.

"Aw, okay," she replied just as reluctantly. Her voice was always comforting.

She opened her door first, which surprised me. Wasn't I the one leaving? I got out and walked to her side of the car, and she stood up to meet me.

"Aren't you going to give me a hug good night?" Did she want me to? Was I supposed to? I couldn't remember ever so much as touching her before.

"Of course." I wrapped my arms around her firmly, pressing her body against mine so that I could smell her fruity shampoo, its scent still lingering even though she had just played volleyball.

To my immense relief, she squeezed back just as tightly. I never wanted to let go.

Most game nights I'd wait longer than usual to call my parents, so I'd have time to be with Nicole. She always asked if I wanted her to wait with me; of course I'd consent, but it was amiable of her to ask— just another reason I liked her so much.

Sometimes Jake would be there too, waiting for his parents like me. Those nights were never as good. But when Nicole and I were alone, we'd sit in her car listening to music and often actually talking. And of course, we'd always end the night with a hug.

[i][size=14pt]Part IV — Eternal Rest[/size][/i]

Mornings at FSK were quite the spectacle: the school was shaped so that the main hallways formed a large square. Kids would walk around and around in either direction from the time they arrived till the first bell, just like herds of cattle.	It was ironic because other schools had nicknamed us "Cornfield High" due to our very rural location (and the actual cornfields surrounding the school). We were all seen as farmers or hicks, which was supposed to be a bad thing, and here we were, grazing mindlessly through our cornfield, playing right into the stereotype.

I didn't mind, though—at least we weren't Heroin High like Westminster—and I was never much for school spirit anyway. Besides, walking the halls in the morning was pretty good exercise if your bus got there early enough, and you passed practically everyone at least once. This was especially good if there was one particular person you wanted to see.

So the next few days at school were cruel: I could think of nothing but Thursday's game— and of Nicole, of course. I would watch her as she passed me in the halls, beautiful as ever, and sometimes she would even give me the slightest of smiles. Good. At least she wasn't ignoring me in person anymore.

None of my friends knew about my new companion. What would they think of my obsession with this junior girl, almost three years older than me, especially when we were never seen together? Thursday morning I forwent the grazing and instead hung by the lockers we never used with my friends that were usually there. Our morning lineup fluctuated, but most of the time I could at least find Erin and David: both were very cool, and both, though David especially, had been my friends for a very long time.

I tried to chat with them like normal, and I did well, considering my mind was elsewhere: down the hall, in fact, as I glimpsed Nicole in the distance, walking in my direction. Of course I got nothing from her but that tiny smile, but it was bigger than before and singlehandedly made today better than the last.

The final bell came faster than I expected; it was the hour-long wait for the buses to arrive that was worst. As I hung around the back parking lot with Jake, I knew this was going to become a routine— quick day at school, torturous wait afterward, not to mention that volleyball games were only on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Sometimes some of the volleyball girls would hang out with us, but it was mostly the JV players; rarely would I see anyone on Varsity, besides maybe Jake's sister Naomi. And never Nicole.

"Hey you." My patient waiting had paid off. Nicole appeared beside me as I was getting on the bus.

"Oh hey!" Still needed to play it cool, had to sound glad she was there, but not too thrilled.

"Where do you wanna sit?"

"Doesn't matter to me." As long as it's next to you.

I followed her to a seat toward the back of the bus. Today she wore light blue jeans—my favorite type on girls—and the same white sweatshirt as usual, but she was no longer White Sweatshirt Girl. Now she was Nicole, my secret friend, and the bus was where we could talk— about everything or nothing at all, and we did both, sharing small parts of ourselves at a time until we knew each other better than anyone had before.

The Eagles won their match, and the one after that and the one after that. Nothing ever changed in volleyball, but each bus ride with Nicole brought us closer together. She was exactly like me, it seemed, and even though we were basically the same person, she was still mysterious to me, the way she sat so casually, the way she pronounced every word as if laughing, and all the little mannerisms I had adored since I'd first happened into her seat last a week ago.

I started seeing more of Nicole after school and at games. I'd make my way toward the team huddles between sets and offer her words of encouragement as the girls went for water. Sometimes she'd ask me to practice with her between the JV and Varsity games, and we'd hit the ball back and forth as we verbally did the same.

I wasn't quite sure what Jake thought of us, but that didn't concern me. Nicole was my secret friend—though I wasn't quite sure why I wanted to keep her secret—and I took every chance I got to be near her, even if that meant leaving Jake to listen to his CD player or talk with his sister.

We got back to the school fairly early one night. I had borrowed Naomi's phone to call my parents just before pulling into the parking lot, so they wouldn't be here for another fifteen minutes. I sighed as I got off the bus and went to wait at the school entrance, where there were benches.

After a while, Nicole sat down beside me. Just as I was hoping.

"Where's your ride?"
	"They should be here in like ten minutes. Why haven't you left yet?" She usually drove straight home after getting off the bus.

"'Cause I didn't want to leave you here alone." Her voice was almost motherly, but that might have been part of the reason I was so infatuated with her.

I looked around the parking lot. It was true; everyone had left but us.

"Aww, thanks." It was intentionally saccharine, but I was more than glad she was here.

She laughed. "Do you want to go sit in my car?"

"Sure."

We walked to her car, a white sedan of some sort—I didn't care enough about cars to tell what model it was—and she got in, unlocking the passenger door for me.

"You've gotta hear this band," she said as I sat down. I felt completely comfortable here.

"Who is it?"

"Avenged Sevenfold."

"Never heard of 'em."

"I'm like obsessed with them now. Here, this is the song I like." She turned to track 6, and screeching guitars filled the car. It was a pretty heavy song.

"I didn't know you liked this type of music," I half–shouted. Music was one of the few things we had yet to talk about.

"I dunno, I just really like this band. I saw them play in the summer. Do you like it?" Nicole was 'rocking out' to the intricate guitar solos that began the song, singing along to lyrics I couldn't understand. It was as if the music had overtaken a part of her, and she was more attractive to me now than ever before.

"Yeah, they sound good." And they were. I liked this type of music; I liked every type of music, especially what she liked.

She turned it down some, and we sat there, listening to this new band. I couldn't stop looking over at her, taking in her dark blonde hair and sparkling eyes, and she smiled every time I did, making her eyes even brighter. Nothing needed to be said, just being there with her in the middle of the dark parking lot was enough.

Organs started playing near the end of the song, and I realized I had forgotten about my parents— I didn't want them finding me in a car with some upper classman they didn't know.

"Well, my parents'll probably be here soon, so I should probably go," I sighed.

"Aw, okay," she replied just as reluctantly. Her voice was always comforting.

She opened her door first, which surprised me. Wasn't I the one leaving? I got out and walked to her side of the car, and she stood up to meet me.

"Aren't you going to give me a hug good night?" Did she want me to? Was I supposed to? I couldn't remember ever so much as touching her before.

"Of course." I wrapped my arms around her firmly, pressing her body against mine so that I could smell her fruity shampoo, its scent still lingering even though she had just played volleyball.

To my immense relief, she squeezed back just as tightly. I never wanted to let go.

Most game nights I'd wait longer than usual to call my parents, so I'd have time to be with Nicole. She always asked if I wanted her to wait with me; of course I'd consent, but it was amiable of her to ask— just another reason I liked her so much.

Sometimes Jake would be there too, waiting for his parents like me. Those nights were never as good. But when Nicole and I were alone, we'd sit in her car listening to music and often actually talking. And of course, we'd always end the night with a hug.

Gamma_Metroid

2008-08-13 11:51:11 am

Ark triple posted :o

I've noticed that you use two different types of apostrophes, the one that looks like a comma

Quote:

Where’s

and one that's the normal kind.

Quote:

Doesn't

Why's that?

arkarian

2008-08-13 04:52:35 pm

red chamber dream

My word processor uses 'smart quotes', which I like in the document, just not on the forum. So I go through each post and change them all manually. I'm sure I could just change them all in the word processor quickly before C/Ping, but I don't feel like it.

So thanks for catching that. Your first example ("Where’s") is how I don't want them to look. "Doesn't" is correct. If you see any more I missed (you probably will), please let me know.

tomatobob

2008-08-13 05:58:23 pm

One shall stand, one shall ball.

In order:
weren’t
Thursday’s
Jake’s
it’s
we’d
wasn’t
wouldn’t
You’ve
didn’t
didn’t
Aren’t
I’d

Ctrl+F FTW.

arkarian

2008-08-13 06:45:44 pm

red chamber dream

Thanks a bundle. Fixed everything on the first page as well.

uNsane

2008-08-13 07:35:45 pm

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I noticed a couple of errors in part 4, but I can't seem to find them anymore... :|

arkarian

Edit history:

arkarian: 2008-08-14 05:37:04 pm

2008-08-14 05:15:14 pm

red chamber dream

Part V — Clearview

"What time is it?" I never liked wearing a watch.

"Six," Nicole said in her usual brusque way.

I laughed. "No it's not."

It was a few days later. We stood outside the school's front entrance, killing time. There was no game today, but I was waiting for my brother, who had finally started giving me rides home. He figured he'd make me ride the bus for a while, since he had to as a freshman, but now was becoming more generous.

"I know; I just like saying that. It's two fifty-two."

'Six' was one of those many mannerisms of hers I loved: something completely ridiculous she did all the time just for the hell of it.

"So are you doing anything tonight?" Everything I asked her was always casual. I had gotten very good at this.

"No.. why?"

"My friend's playing a concert at my church, the one around the corner from here… you should come."

"When is it?"

"I think it starts at seven–thirty, but I'll probably get there a little later than that."

"Okay, well I might drop by." Nicole always seemed so busy— I had never seen her outside of school, as if our friendship didn't exist anywhere else.

"Okay, cool."

After a minute or so, a red car pulled up beside us.

"Hey fucker, let's go." That's my brother for you.

My friend's band had already started playing when I walked into the church's main room. I looked around for Nicole, but of course she wasn't there— she said she'd be here later, if she showed up at all. A few of my 'sort–of friends' were playing pool in a corner, so I decided to hang out with them, but Nicole's possible appearance was the only reason I was here.

I went through the motions with the people around me for most of the night, playing pool, eating junk food, listening to the band play. They were pretty good, but eventually I couldn't stand the monotony any longer and decided to go outside.

A few more people I knew were playing Keep Away or something in the parking lot, so I sat and watched with the younger kids. After a few minutes, I felt a tap on my shoulder.

"Hey you," she said cutely, but I already knew who it was.

"Hey." I got up to face her. "Took you long enough," I said playfully. No point in being upset with her, after all, she had said she wasn't sure if she'd be able to make it or not. In fact, I didn't know why I was even thinking about feeling upset. She had done nothing wrong at all, and she was here now. That's all that mattered.

"I can't stay too long, but wanna go swing?" She pointed to the playground across the lot.

"Sure," I laughed. Playing on the swings sounded just like something she'd want to do. We each took a swing, but neither of us pushed off too hard.

"So do you have to be home soon or something?" I asked.

"Yeah, my stupid mom makes me come home before ten, and she's always bitchiest when Ray's around. So… yeah."

Ray was her mom's on–and–off boyfriend. He didn't sound like the greatest person in the world.

"Hah, yeah I understand." I ran my hands up and down on the chains of the swing. "So have you talked to Brandon lately?"

"Yeah, actually him and I are cool now."

"Not mad at you anymore?"

"Nahh." Wow, I loved the way she talked.

"What about Rob?"

"What about Rob?" she asked innocently.

I laughed. "Well have you talked to him since Florida?"

"Nah, I like Brandon better," she replied matter–of–factly.

"Ahh, okay."

We swung for a while longer, but eventually she got up to leave. Moments with Nicole always ended far too quickly.

"Walk me to my car?"

"Sure," I replied, happy to do so.

Nicole moved closer to me, and as if it were the most natural thing in the world, she laced her fingers through mine. Instantly my stomach contracted as if it were hungry, but this was different from hunger, something more intense, and very foreign. It was strange, and I loved it.

"Hey, did I give you my number yet?" she asked once we reached her car. How was she remaining so insouciant?

"Nope." I realized I could be cool, too, at least in speech.

"Do you have a cell?" Her fingers were so soft in mine; she was firm and gentle at the same time.

"Nope."

She smiled. "Well here." She released my hand and dug through her purse. I gently flexed my fingers—they didn't even feel like mine now—as I watched Nicole pull out a pen and scrap of yellow paper. She was amazing.

"There you go." She handed me the paper, which I shoved into my shorts pocket.

"Thanks."

"You can call me any time you want. Seriously, my phone's on all the time, so if you ever want to talk please call me." Her shining eyes confirmed her sincerity as they peered into mine. "See you Monday."

I grabbed her into the hug I'd been wanting all day. "Have a good night."

As she drove away, my stomach was still lurching— this must be the 'butterflies' you always hear people talk about. Rubbing my still–warm fingers together, I silently waited in the parking lot for my mom to arrive.

[i][size=14pt]Part V — Clearview[/size][/i]

"What time is it?" I never liked wearing a watch.

"Six," Nicole said in her usual brusque way.

I laughed. "No it's not."

It was a few days later. We stood outside the school's front entrance, killing time. There was no game today, but I was waiting for my brother, who had finally started giving me rides home. He figured he'd make me ride the bus for a while, since he had to as a freshman, but now was becoming more generous.

"I know; I just like saying that. It's two fifty-two."

'Six' was one of those many mannerisms of hers I loved: something completely ridiculous she did all the time just for the hell of it.

"So are you doing anything tonight?" Everything I asked her was always casual. I had gotten very good at this.

"No.. why?"

"My friend's playing a concert at my church, the one around the corner from here… you should come."

"When is it?"

"I think it starts at seven–thirty, but I'll probably get there a little later than that."

"Okay, well I might drop by." Nicole always seemed so busy— I had never seen her outside of school, as if our friendship didn't exist anywhere else.

"Okay, cool."

After a minute or so, a red car pulled up beside us.

"Hey fucker, let's go." That's my brother for you.

My friend's band had already started playing when I walked into the church's main room. I looked around for Nicole, but of course she wasn't there— she said she'd be here later, if she showed up at all. A few of my 'sort–of friends' were playing pool in a corner, so I decided to hang out with them, but Nicole's possible appearance was the only reason I was here.

I went through the motions with the people around me for most of the night, playing pool, eating junk food, listening to the band play. They were pretty good, but eventually I couldn't stand the monotony any longer and decided to go outside.

A few more people I knew were playing Keep Away or something in the parking lot, so I sat and watched with the younger kids. After a few minutes, I felt a tap on my shoulder.

"Hey you," she said cutely, but I already knew who it was.

"Hey." I got up to face her. "Took you long enough," I said playfully. No point in being upset with her, after all, she [i]had[/i] said she wasn't sure if she'd be able to make it or not. In fact, I didn't know why I was even thinking about feeling upset. She had done nothing wrong at all, and she was here now. That's all that mattered.

"I can't stay too long, but wanna go swing?" She pointed to the playground across the lot.

"Sure," I laughed. Playing on the swings sounded just like something she'd want to do. We each took a swing, but neither of us pushed off too hard.

"So do you have to be home soon or something?" I asked.

"Yeah, my stupid mom makes me come home before ten, and she's always bitchiest when Ray's around. So… yeah."

Ray was her mom's on–and–off boyfriend. He didn't sound like the greatest person in the world.

"Hah, yeah I understand." I ran my hands up and down on the chains of the swing. "So have you talked to Brandon lately?"

"Yeah, actually him and I are cool now."

"Not mad at you anymore?"

"Nahh." Wow, I loved the way she talked.

"What about Rob?"

"What [i]about[/i] Rob?" she asked innocently.

I laughed. "Well have you talked to him since Florida?"

"Nah, I like Brandon better," she replied matter–of–factly.

"Ahh, okay."

We swung for a while longer, but eventually she got up to leave. Moments with Nicole always ended far too quickly.

"Walk me to my car?"

"Sure," I replied, happy to do so.

Nicole moved closer to me, and as if it were the most natural thing in the world, she laced her fingers through mine. Instantly my stomach contracted as if it were hungry, but this was different from hunger, something more intense, and very foreign. It was strange, and I loved it.

"Hey, did I give you my number yet?" she asked once we reached her car. How was she remaining so insouciant?

"Nope." I realized I could be cool, too, at least in speech.

"Do you have a cell?" Her fingers were so soft in mine; she was firm and gentle at the same time.

"Nope."

She smiled. "Well here." She released my hand and dug through her purse. I gently flexed my fingers—they didn't even feel like mine now—as I watched Nicole pull out a pen and scrap of yellow paper. She was amazing.

"There you go." She handed me the paper, which I shoved into my shorts pocket.

"Thanks."

"You can call me any time you want. Seriously, my phone's on all the time, so if you ever want to talk please call me." Her shining eyes confirmed her sincerity as they peered into mine. "See you Monday."

I grabbed her into the hug I'd been wanting all day. "Have a good night."

As she drove away, my stomach was still lurching— this must be the 'butterflies' you always hear people talk about. Rubbing my still–warm fingers together, I silently waited in the parking lot for my mom to arrive.

tomatobob

2008-08-14 05:23:12 pm

One shall stand, one shall ball.

I am of the opinion that swings are one of mankind's greatest achievements.

Not much to say about this part really looks fairly solid..

BioSpark

2008-08-14 09:12:52 pm

This^

I'll get around to your earlier parts later.

arkarian

2008-08-14 09:14:26 pm

red chamber dream

lol, might not want to read them out of order once we get to the good stuff. For the first act (probably going to be the first ten parts) it won't matter much, but later it will.

BioSpark

2008-08-14 09:17:41 pm

No, I meant I'll comment on parts 3 and 4 when I have some time.

arkarian

Edit history:

arkarian: 2008-08-15 09:57:52 pm

2008-08-15 07:02:15 pm

red chamber dream

Part VI — Bricks Recruiter

The next night, I turned on my computer monitor, hoping Nicole had left a message for me. Of course she hadn't—she never did—but still each evening I'd hope to find something. Oh well, at least she was online tonight, and even though she was away at the moment, it was better than her not being on at all. That happened far too often.

For the past few weeks I had been fascinated by a small computer game called Bricks. I had first found out about it from Radix, an administrator of an internet forum I frequently browsed though had never made an account on. Well, I didn't hear of it from him directly, but the colorful pattern of rectangles—actually bricks—beside each of his posts caught my eye, and I figured his subtitle, "Bricks Recruiter", had something to do with that pattern. Quickly I discovered the image of the little rectangles was a screenshot of a game, and soon after downloading the pleasingly small program, I was hooked.

I was playing Bricks when Nicole's status finally changed from "Away" to "Available".

theoffspring01: hey
xfarfromp3rfectx: hey!
theoffspring01: what's up?
xfarfromp3rfectx: nmu
theoffspring01: nothing
theoffspring01: i'm playing this game i'm obsessed with
xfarfromp3rfectx: what game?
theoffspring01: it's called bricks

My responses were a little delayed due to the game. It got more and more challenging, each new level more frustrating but more fulfilling than the last, and it was addicting.

xfarfromp3rfectx: whats that
theoffspring01: a puzzle game
theoffspring01: i've been playing it all night lol
xfarfromp3rfectx: i wanna play!!
theoffspring01: ok h/o
theoffspring01: k go to http://www.bricks-game.de/indexuk.html
theoffspring01: and click "Bricks I" on the left
theoffspring01: then "Download Center", also on the left
theoffspring01: you want the windows version of course
xfarfromp3rfectx: ok

She was into the game much more quickly than I had expected.

xfarfromp3rfectx: ok so what do i have to do?
theoffspring01: what you're trying to do is get the red brick onto the red squares
theoffspring01: so on the first level you move the other bricks to get it out
theoffspring01: but the less bricks you move, the higher your score
theoffspring01: and only the red brick can make the blue brick disappear
xfarfromp3rfectx: ok i beat level 1

I had barely finished my explanation, and she was already on level two! This girl was absolutely fascinating.

theoffspring01: heh i'm on twenty-two
xfarfromp3rfectx: you should go back to level 3 and race me!
theoffspring01: are you already there?
xfarfromp3rfectx: almost
theoffspring01: k let me know when you are

It only took her a few more seconds to clear level two.

xfarfromp3rfectx: ok
xfarfromp3rfectx: lets
xfarfromp3rfectx: race!

I quickly clicked through the puzzle, shuffling bricks as fast I could. Having already cleared this level numerous times, I made short work of it.

theoffspring01: done
xfarfromp3rfectx: your stupid
xfarfromp3rfectx: ok next level

She continued to lose timewise, but after a few more stages we started comparing move counts as well, and surprisingly, she often beat me at that. I lost track of time as we battled through level after level, eventually reaching puzzles so difficult they took minutes to complete.

xfarfromp3rfectx: these are getting really hard lol
theoffspring01: yeah as you go on there's more stuff to keep track of
theoffspring01: like switches and shit
xfarfromp3rfectx: yeah lol
xfarfromp3rfectx: ok im done racing
xfarfromp3rfectx: ..for now
theoffspring01: lol
theoffspring01: you know what i like?
xfarfromp3rfectx: what
theoffspring01: maximize your game window

I laughed to myself; this was my personal favorite thing about Bricks.

xfarfromp3rfectx: MONSTERBLOCK!!!!
theoffspring01: ahahahaha
theoffspring01: awesome
xfarfromp3rfectx: omg i love MONSTERBLOCK
xfarfromp3rfectx: im gonna play this way from now on
theoffspring01: heh monsterblock huh?
xfarfromp3rfectx: no, MONSTERBLOCK
xfarfromp3rfectx: caps.
theoffspring01: haha i love it

I clicked back to my Bricks game, maximizing it. Now the screen was filled with giant blocks. I found them utterly hilarious, and I'm glad Nicole thought so, too.

xfarfromp3rfectx: the only problem is i cant talk on here at the same time
theoffspring01: yeah
xfarfromp3rfectx: brb

She did this all the time; leaving right in the middle of our conversations. It was fine, though; I was just glad Bricks had sucked her in like it had me. It had become 'our' game over the past few hours, and now I eagerly anticipated many more nights of playing with her. I loved the way she had nicknamed it "MONSTERBLOCK", too, insisting on using all–caps— just another of her infectious quirks.

I decided to check Nicole's AIM profile while she was away; I loved reading people's profiles, even those of people I didn't know. It passed the time during pauses in conversation and was usually fairly interesting.

xfarfromp3rfectx: hey i have to go, but i wanna play more MONSTERBLOCK tomorrow!
xfarfromp3rfectx: bye
theoffspring01: ok night!
(00:14) AIM System Alert: xfarfromp3rfectx has gone offline.

She always signed off before I could say my goodbye. I sighed and looked back at the screen, where her profile was still open. Like usual, it contained a mish-mash of quotes from movies like A Walk To Remember, as well as something about FSK volleyball and how great her friends were. But this time, at the bottom, there was something else that instantly caught my eye:

ethan <3.

I squinted at the screen, making absolutely sure I was reading it correctly. Surely it didn't refer to a different Ethan? I knew, though, without a doubt, that Nicole meant me. Now I was more than just her pet freshman—whatever that meant—and that felt very, very good.

[i][size=14pt]Part VI — Bricks Recruiter[/size][/i]

The next night, I turned on my computer monitor, hoping Nicole had left a message for me. Of course she hadn't—she never did—but still each evening I'd hope to find something. Oh well, at least she was online tonight, and even though she was away at the moment, it was better than her not being on at all. That happened far too often.

For the past few weeks I had been fascinated by a small computer game called Bricks. I had first found out about it from Radix, an administrator of an internet forum I frequently browsed though had never made an account on. Well, I didn't hear of it from him directly, but the colorful pattern of rectangles—actually bricks—beside each of his posts caught my eye, and I figured his subtitle, "Bricks Recruiter", had something to do with that pattern. Quickly I discovered the image of the little rectangles was a screenshot of a game, and soon after downloading the pleasingly small program, I was hooked.

I was playing Bricks when Nicole's status finally changed from "Away" to "Available".

[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]hey[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]hey![/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]what's up?[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]nmu[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]nothing[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]i'm playing this game i'm obsessed with[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]what game?[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]it's called bricks[/color]

My responses were a little delayed due to the game. It got more and more challenging, each new level more frustrating but more fulfilling than the last, and it was addicting.

[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]whats that[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]a puzzle game[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]i've been playing it all night lol[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]i wanna play!![/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]ok h/o[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]k go to htt[i][/i]p://ww[i][/i]w.bricks-game.de/indexuk.html[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]and click "Bricks I" on the left[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]then "Download Center", also on the left[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]you want the windows version of course[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]ok[/color]

She was into the game much more quickly than I had expected.

[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]ok so what do i have to do?[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]what you're trying to do is get the red brick onto the red squares[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]so on the first level you move the other bricks to get it out[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]but the less bricks you move, the higher your score[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]and only the red brick can make the blue brick disappear[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]ok i beat level 1[/color]

I had barely finished my explanation, and she was already on level two! This girl was absolutely fascinating.

[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]heh i'm on twenty-two[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]you should go back to level 3 and race me![/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]are you already there?[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]almost[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]k let me know when you are[/color]

It only took her a few more seconds to clear level two.

[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]ok[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]lets[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]race![/color]

I quickly clicked through the puzzle, shuffling bricks as fast I could. Having already cleared this level numerous times, I made short work of it.

[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]done[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]your stupid[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]ok next level[/color]

She continued to lose timewise, but after a few more stages we started comparing move counts as well, and surprisingly, she often beat me at that. I lost track of time as we battled through level after level, eventually reaching puzzles so difficult they took minutes to complete.

[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]these are getting really hard lol[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]yeah as you go on there's more stuff to keep track of[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]like switches and shit[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]yeah lol[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]ok im done racing[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]..for now[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]lol[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]you know what i like?[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]what[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]maximize your game window[/color]

I laughed to myself; this was my personal favorite thing about Bricks.

[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]MONSTERBLOCK!!!![/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]ahahahaha[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]awesome[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]omg i love MONSTERBLOCK[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]im gonna play this way from now on[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]heh monsterblock huh?[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]no, MONSTERBLOCK[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]caps.[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]haha i love it[/color]

I clicked back to my Bricks game, maximizing it. Now the screen was filled with giant blocks. I found them utterly hilarious, and I'm glad Nicole thought so, too.

[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]the only problem is i cant talk on here at the same time[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]yeah[/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]brb[/color]

She did this all the time; leaving right in the middle of our conversations. It was fine, though; I was just glad Bricks had sucked her in like it had me. It had become 'our' game over the past few hours, and now I eagerly anticipated many more nights of playing with her. I loved the way she had nicknamed it "MONSTERBLOCK", too, insisting on using all–caps— just another of her infectious quirks.

I decided to check Nicole's AIM profile while she was away; I loved reading people's profiles, even those of people I didn't know. It passed the time during pauses in conversation and was usually fairly interesting.

[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]hey i have to go, but i wanna play more MONSTERBLOCK tomorrow![/color]
	[color=red][b]xfarfromp3rfectx[/b]:[/color] [color=pink]bye[/color]
	[color=darkblue][b]theoffspring01[/b]:[/color] [color=darkorange]ok night![/color]
	[color=gray][b](00:14) AIM System Alert: [i]xfarfromp3rfectx has gone offline.[/i][/b][/color]

She always signed off before I could say my goodbye. I sighed and looked back at the screen, where her profile was still open. Like usual, it contained a mish-mash of quotes from movies like [i]A Walk To Remember[/i], as well as something about FSK volleyball and how great her friends were. But this time, at the bottom, there was something else that instantly caught my eye:

[color=red][i]ethan <3.[/i][/color]

I squinted at the screen, making absolutely sure I was reading it correctly. Surely it didn't refer to a different Ethan? I knew, though, without a doubt, that Nicole meant me. Now I was more than just her pet freshman—whatever that meant—and that felt very, very good.

tomatobob

2008-08-15 07:10:50 pm

One shall stand, one shall ball.

Quote:

theoffspring01: theoffspring01: it's called bricks

Thought you might want to fix that.

Nice chapter, Bricks recruiter indeed.

arkarian

2008-08-15 07:15:12 pm

red chamber dream

Whoops, thanks. Glad you enjoyed Part VI.

Gamma_Metroid

2008-08-15 07:19:00 pm

Quote from Arkarian:

The next night, I turned on my computer monitor

You leave your computer running, but turn the monitor off? :-s

arkarian

2008-08-15 07:21:34 pm

red chamber dream

Yep. I had a CRT monitor at the time, and leaving the monitor on all night, even with a screensaver, is worse for its screen than just turning it off.

Gamma_Metroid

2008-08-15 07:41:21 pm

Quote from Arkarian:

Yep. I had a CRT monitor at the time, and leaving the monitor on all night, even with a screensaver, is worse for its screen than just turning it off.

Yeah, but why would you keep the computer running? Would it actually be doing anything?

arkarian

2008-08-15 07:44:54 pm

red chamber dream

It would be keeping me logged into AIM, plus shutting down computers is pointless when they're not going anywhere. Just takes longer to be able to use them later.

Gamma_Metroid

2008-08-15 08:20:33 pm

Quote from Arkarian:

It would be keeping me logged into AIM, plus shutting down computers is pointless when they're not going anywhere. Just takes longer to be able to use them later.

One, it uses power, and two, it might be struck by lightning and explode! :o

By the way, Bricks is a fun game.